So what do we do with the PC muscle? Well, you can squeeze the PC by tensing around your genitals as if to stop urinating or prevent bowel movement. Squeeze it when aroused in order to intensify pleasure, to stop an orgasm, to bring it on, or to prolong it. Prolonging an orgasm can be done by squeezing the PC to pause the sensation of orgasm, then releasing the contraction to continue the flow of pleasure. The more you practice squeezing and holding the PC on your own, the better control you will have with your PC muscle during sexual activity. For muscle strengthening, squeeze 10 to 30 times, not more than three times a day, varying the duration and power of the squeeze. Here’s a very simple exercise: Really try to play with your breath when aroused. Try panting. Short, shallow breaths can take your body into a higher state of arousal. On the other hand, taking long, slow breaths can slow down arousal, relaxing your body on a physiological level, and thus helping you be more sensitive and attuned to touch. Regulating the breath is also key to having an energy orgasm, the tantric sex practice of reaching orgasm with no touch at all. (Here’s our full guide to tantric sex if you’re curious.) Those with a penis can multiply their orgasms, too. Alfred Kinsey’s reports from the 1940s and 5'0s were the first to reveal brain scans showing that the function of orgasm and ejaculation are governed by two separate parts of a man’s brain. In fact, in both tantric and Taoist practices, men are taught to experience the contraction and pleasure of orgasm without releasing semen, known as semen retention. It’s the ejaculation that is tiring and is the end of erection—not the orgasm itself. This topic could be multiple books unto itself, and I highly suggest consulting Mantak Chia’s famous book, The Multi-Orgasmic Man. (Here’s our full guide to multiple orgasms for men.) The key is to find ways to feel relaxed while tapping into your sexual energy. Try doing this alone, as it takes practice—and there’s no such thing as too much practice. But keep in mind: It’s also essential to communicate with your partner. (Here’s our full guide to edging for more powerful orgasms.) Get to know what makes you aroused. Explore what path your arousal takes: Does it peak and then stop? Does it fizzle out slowly? Does it never lift off? Practice staying in a state of arousal as long as possible, and get yourself on a steady diet of non-goal-focused, exploratory self-pleasure. Above all else, remember that your body knows exactly what to do. All it needs is to remember and be gently trained and retrained. When you’re ready, try to have a full-body orgasm next.
